Latest Cool Definitions

Divorce :

Future tense of marriage.


Cigarette :

A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.


Lecture :

An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"


Conference :

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise :

The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Tears :

The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...


Dictionary :

A place where success comes before work.


Conference Room :

A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.


Classic :

A book which people praise, but do not read.


Smile :

A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


Office :

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


Yawn :

The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc. :
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Committee :

Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Experience :

The name men give to their mistakes.


Atom Bomb :

An invention to end all inventions.


Philosopher :

A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.


Diplomat :

A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.


Opportunist :

A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.


Optimist :

A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."


Miser :

A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.


Father :

A banker provided by nature.


Criminal :

A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.


Boss :

Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Politician :

One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.


Doctor :

A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.